Thats something to write home to mom about
Dear Mom, I had sex last nt w a girl that liked to b choked. Im n love. Cant wait for you to meet her
I just made a friends list on fb of all the guys ive hooked up with. genius.
she's in the bathroom. spitting in the trashcan. not throwing up. just spitting and singing bad romance by lady gaga.
thatta girl
Some chick in the back of my Psychologhy of Addictions class just did a line off her hand. She tried to make it look subtle.
Too late, the blunt's already in my cleavage
We are so drunk I just let him piss between my legs on the toilet. That's love.
The water bill last month was outrageous. We have got to stop fucking for hours in the shower
I just saw the list where the U.S. doesn't even rank in the top 10 in drinking countries. I know its Tuesday but....its for America
He gave them shots of purell and called it "acid rain" jello shots. They took them.
I hate freshman.
You were screaming across the bar "BUYING US SHOTS ISN'T GOING TO MAKE US STRAIGHT, YA KNOW!!!!!!!!"
Pretty sure he sprained my tongue. This is why you don't hook up with gingers.
Want to come over and play therapist and then fuck all the emotion away?
Her virginity is one of the last things that remains of our childhood.
lesson #1 of freshman year: grinding with a sombrero is difficult
I bet Billy Ray Cyrus wishes he had pulled out now....
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