I have a new suitor he got my # last nite... I was to tipsy to function! What was I thinking!! It's like u when u first met me
It was weird to see you drinking wine out a glass instead of a red cup today
hungover + watching bobsledding = i just puked
so its thursday, which means its time to resume communication with you
If we break up, I want weekend visitations with your penis.
He pulled a potato out of his bag in the library. A WHOLE FRIGGIN POTATO. He ate it like it was an apple and waved at the librarian as she stared at him.
So I'm seriously not complaining - but I just fell ass backwards into a Tuesday night threesome. Sober
I'd rather just be alone, than deal with this bullshit. I just want to be alone. Cats and vibrators never let you down.
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
Just busted the chick who slept with my boyfriend with alcohol. God I love being an RA.
My little sister just helped me edit my nudes so that's how my night is going
This fucking storm better not ruin my sex plans this weekend
You coming to give me head and eat tacos?
i am not an asshole. i paid for her to take a cab home.
dude, we were in ann arbor. she's from cincinnati. ten bucks didn't even get her back on I-94. i maintain my position. you are indeed an asshole.
you asked me how to turn on the ladder
Randomize
