I need to take "lollipop" off of every single one of my playlists cause it makes me wanna suck dick.
I replied to the university automated mass text about the armed robbery at the on-campus Starbucks with a sad face. Basically sums up my night.
do you wanna get some fucking pussy tonight.....THEN DRESS LIKE IT
Just had a flashback of you announcing "your nipples aren't that big for the size of your boobs, I've seen them"
Also there's a dick sized hole in my tights...should I be worried?
there is beer in every square inch of this apartment and he hasn't even lived in it for 24 hours. we're playing some game that involves slamming beer, beer pong and smacking people's cups out of their hands.
I officially became the girl who let a guy get her off under the covers last night while her roommate and a friend were there. He was impressed by my ability to stay quiet and stay relatively focused on the conversation...
I am so ashamed of you, and yet so proud.
Uh yeah. I ate a brick of cheese. Didn't even cut it. We were admiring the teeth marks I was leaving. We decided it was the negative of my mouth
Is it cheating if its a threesome? This is more like a party game than infidelity.
My mom just walked in and she was like "Who ate all of the cheese?" and all I could think of was you trying to become a human taco
I completely forgot about the posting of partying pics shortly after adding my gma my dad was like grandma says your all over fb but she doesn't know how to use it. Of course I'm all over her fb. She's got 6 friends I am her newsfeed
Sorry, I didn't know he was with you. The ongoing collapse of Trump has me horny as hell.
I fucked his roommate. And that roommate's best friend. And my roommate. And my roommate's old roommate.
i'm bowing down, but slow your roll.
were you aware we were supposed to be taking care of her hamster this weekend?
I think I may have gotten way too used to using my boobs as an extra hand/pocket...almost stabbed myself in the chin bc I forgot I put my fork there
Randomize
