Lets date for the summer
what?
Dont love me in September.
I enjoy that i have a whole shelf of clothes that I've accumulated from random sex. You know the ones you get to make the morning after look less awkward like similar to an athletes trophy shelf
just passed a tour group on my way home. the guide actually said: 'and THAT kids is whats known as the walk of shame'
I just found pie in my hoodie pocket... This break needs to end.
Even when you're not here I still manage to get pad thai in my vagina
hes either a crazy bad problem or a crazy good orgasm. I just can't decide which one.
Just bought the plane tickets. Light headed. Blood rush to clit oh god blue clit. Mayday mayday vagina down!
Idk man, she was drunker than me and i was sitting there talking to a raccoon about it's broken leg.
How do u even exfoliate your vagina
My booty call made my bed while I was in the shower. I may have to marry him.
Even in drag you're still better looking than your sister.
Yeah I passed out. The last thing I remember is the lady telling me I couldn't play the clarinet with my nose.
I think this is the first time I heard a lesbian version of baby it's cold outside.
she hand cuffed me to the bed naked, jumped off the dresser naked, hit her head on the fan and knocked herself out. when her mom came home i had to call her for help, she could have died man...
Turns out my GF and my FWB have a mutual friend. Yada yada yada, I need to crash on your couch
Randomize
