So I got hit on by a gay guy. It might have something to do with the fact that I licked his nose.
And why did you do that?
Tequila
5 am is for sleeping. Or getting railed on by a stranger. But never for fundraising. Get real.
get over here now. the boys are doing shots of everclear, chasing with monster, and some dude jsut walked in with a backpack full of tattoo gear.
Did I crawl through the hotel lobby all the way to our room?
I have a question: does pizza dipped in chili sound good or am I just really high?
She told me my dick looked like a baby seal wrapped in a sleeping bag.
If there's one thing i learned from edward 40hands is that i couldnt handle life with bottles for hands
one more hour of this work bullshit and I'm off to get high with your cat.
Incase you were wondering. Cooking naked turns into sex. Sex and cooking may lead to house fire....
You owe me beer. On another note, I made out with the ups guy at work today ....
Her four year old daughter walked up to me grabbed my junk and said "this will be in mommy later." Wtf?
First morning at school this semester and I threw up in a bush during my walk of shame.
If you can't beat em, make them send you dick pics so they can't do anything stupid again.
Come on, what straight woman, gay man, or bi person HASN'T scrolled through Justin Trudeau pictures after a bad day?
Literally just stood behind a guy in line at Walmart get his card declined when he attempted to purchase condoms. That's rock bottom.
Randomize