recess is on disney at 4 in the morning, insomnia has never been so rewarding
she was using a pencil to fish crushed adderall out of a plastic bag. it was like a college version of fun dip
A girl limped into my class 15 minutes late wearing sunglasses, leggings, and a kiss me im irish shirt. She sat down and took her glasses off and im pretty sure she only had one eye's makeup still on. Someone had a great st pattys day.
Remeber when I drunkenly made out with him this summer while he was getting bitched at by his girlfriend on the phone? Yeah, neither do I. But I'm pretty sure that same thing happened again last night.
drunk taco night MLK would want it this way.
I imagine I kinda look like a banana with one boob out.
Yeah, surprised you made it on time this morning. Remarkable, considering 2 hours ago you were pretending to be talking window curtains.
His and hers buttplugs were a resounding success. Tru luv
next time im at a party and go to fist bump the dude who took my virginity two years ago PLEASE STOP ME
Dude, I traded weed for crunch berries. Happy Thursday.
Whats a little naked between friends. Just don't laugh or I'll be scared for life.
Just puked in a cup. Poured it out the window.
Remember the time you puked your contact lens out?
I just realized, you're dating a guy named Jameson. That is another level of whiskey dick.
Just puked in front of a high school tour group. Based on the standing ovation, we have a solid group of freshman coming in this fall.
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