Have you ever noticed every guy named Shaant has scene hair and date girls with racoons stripes in theirs
His name should be shouldn't
Since when is my name a synonym for head?
vicodin is the reason why I believe in magic
You NEED to fuck him he's a doctor with one leg. Are you kidding me right now. This will definitely make the list. Plus he buys all of us drinks.
I just saw that blonde chick you wanna bang rolling down the hall wearing a Thor mask..
Wow. We're meant to be..
Today's forecast is horny with strong chance of booty calls. Low of Craigslist cruising, and a high of climaxing in a stranger's bed.
After seeing all of the pics during the trial, all I could think was "her vagina doesn't look THAT dangerous"
Her next conquest seems to be stealing her ex-boyfriend's new girlfriend. Pretty sure everyone involved is totally OK with this.
I want your cock.
All we are is dust in the wiiiiiiinnnnnnnnnnd
I may be asexual, but I owe you a solid from yesterday. I am a man of my word.
plus like he's kinda a piece of shit. a beautiful somewhat talented piece of shit that hella needs to get his life together
That awkward moment when you realize that last night you walked from in n out to petco, bought a mouse for $3, named it mogar, taught it how to skateboard on a techdeck, made it a home out of a trash can, fed it fruity pebbles and cheese, and then forgot where you left it.
Woke up in a car, do you own a silver car parked a few miles form the house...hope so
Wine through a straw in a subway cup.....classy
Only you would offer whiskey to a man in liver failure.
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