i need a penis for penetration, you wont do.
oh yeah... my b.
Are you drinking alone?
no, i'm watching house
That doesn't count.
wtf, then i'm always alone
quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
he just told me about his fetish for rubbing grape jelly on his penis.
it's gonna be a chat room kind of night
we didn't have anything to do and wanted to get our money's worth out of our costumes, so if you see two mermaids day drinking by the creek it's us
Of all the shitty people we associated with, you should be happy that I'm the one fucking your cousin. Sorry.
Lol. Awesome. Seriously though, I need you focused next year. We're gone have a lot of drinking and stupid nonsense to do, and I don't want dumb shit like responsibility to get in my fucking way.
Now some guy that's in my phone as " Alex lip ring hot" is texting me and I don't where life is taking me
Note to self: if you decide to go to the gym when you're coming down from your day high to shoot some hoops, do NOT play pickup basketball with the big black dudes who need a sixth
Negotiating with my body. We're ok. Violent upheaval is not necessary.
I "liked" his changed relationship status just to show him I'm ok with the fact he found someone not as pretty as me
I convinced her that there were two p's in Chipotle - the 2nd one was silent.
Better not shit yourself at the gym.
My vagina is very pro this idea
Randomize
