People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
Even DaVinci knew it was gay to draw the penis big. Thanks art history
You had sex with him even after he literally described himself as a "coldplay guy"? There's a line you just don't cross. There is a line.
I decided that $2 and a kiss on the cheek was a great tip for the pizza girl. No one is REALLY sure how much I've have to drink.
Just found out my mom tried to sue the birth control company when she got pregnant with me...love you too mom.
yeah, I said "hi, I'm the creepy old guy at the college bar" and she said that she like mature men, wasn't expecting that line to work
I shouldn't trust a guy I just met with the pull out method. That's a big responsibility.
There's somethin not right about having to take the batteries out of your 27 year old boyfriends gameboy to use in your vibrator
So burnt out. Like weed hangover. And someone just fell through the ceiling outside of my class. How's your morning going?
We just had a sexually tense moment where we both chose the trough the pee. I love gay clubs.
My penis just literally said "Yaaaaaay!!!" It's the first time it's spoken out loud. Before this we could only communicate through rudimentary sign language
Just passed the animal clinic parking lot I had to pull over to puke in during welcome week. I can almost hear the dogs barking at my shame again.
I swear to the sweet baby jesus I didn't fill your freezer with salsa and my little pony toys, but I didn't stop them either.
All I wanted was to die alone with my dogs....how did I end up here
I don't know if I should laugh or punch you
i just called dibs on the taxi driver at the bar that isnt drinking. im a grown up
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