Getting fucked up met up rando with a girl I confesswed my love for last night. weird, going with it
Looks like an M-80 went off in a lb. of pastrami
I've come to the conclusion that the only reason I fucked him was because he reminded me of Seth Rogen.
No, we're smoking outside. We're hot boxing the world.
Drunken horseback riding is the absolute worst decision i've ever made in my life.
Dude, I had to masturbate just to stay warm. Please pay the gas bill?
all i remember was you yelling "look at my little feet" at everyone on the way home from the bar.
You hit on my mom and then passed out in the kiddie pool.
...I'm not a booty call or a pizza...you can't just call/text and expect to be eating me in an hour..
Sorry I sent you a video of a singing reverend last night, I was really high.
It's amazing what a couple of orgasms can do for a girls demeanor.
Tell him you want to lick his face. Didn't work for me but might turn out better for you idk
I can guarantee he will smoke me out and I won't feel bad about it because he gets to touch my butt.
There are way too many people I have fucked in this class for this not to be awkward
So how do u get your coat out of the coat room when someone is fucking on it?
Randomize
