brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
i can't watch a movie tonight dude, im smoking weed
you smoke with your eyes?
Dude, I couldnt get it up cause she said her parents were home...
ok, come over...I have doritos
I'm pretty sure the only race ive ever won was to my mothers egg
I was high enough to understand and function with 'flip' while playing brick breaker
Damn. I don't think I could ever be that high.
we banged on the home plate. i wasnt even aware of the significance of where we were until afterwards hahaha
He broke into my apartment to check his Facebook again, the beer is all gone, and there's a new high score on pac man.
Yeah. I realized I have a weakness for drugs and I need to move somewhere where I don't know how to find them.
When theres a zombie apocalypse, i will be the only fat survivor. I ate chef boyardi ravioli with part of a pen for a fork
Let me begin to explain the rest of last night by beginning with saying that out if necessity I took a pair of your underwear
Can we make 2014 the year of no unsolicited dick pics?
I didn't want to hook up with him so I just jumped out of bed, yelled "I don't even believe in god!" and ran out of the room
I stepped in puke last night then washed it off my shoe with beer. Is there a grace period to respect before wearing them to class?
We were making eye contact while i was throwing up.
our moms work together...I can just see the conversation now, hey your daughter ruined my sons marriage, that's probably how it will start.
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