Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
when we were having sex and i started crying and telling you i missed you..why couldnt you stop and tell me how you felt or make me feel better?you kept going...
just found my calculator watch from 6th grade. the hipster transformation is complete
can't wait for January to be Over so I don't have to see all the fat resolutionists working out.
And just when I was about to fall asleep, he hit me in the face, and claimed he's a "violent sleeper".
Bring my lunch to work in liquor store bags is doing nothing for my career
Pretty sure even her dog was surprised when I got that blow job.
It's been so long since i rode in a trunk. I'm riding in a trunk btw
I CAN CONTROL MY GERBIL WITH MY BREATH. HE FOLLOWS THE SMELL. PROBABLY WOULDNT BE AS EXCITING IF I WASNT HIGH OFF MY ASS, BUT STILL
i formally give you permission to eat me when i pass out
She complimented my boobs and then told me I smelled like teddy bears before falling asleep on the floor.
alll i remember is comming back downstairs, his pants were off and he was aplauding me
Seriously just told the plant the cheese Pringles are mine.
All that stuff they told us in middle school about drugs being easy to find was a bullshit lie.
Dude, they hit that lizard part of my brain that tells me to fuck people.
Preach sister.
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