Nakedness is not a toga. Just sayin
Just bored and untired. I want to be in Austin. At college. Drinking someone elses alcohol. Am I asking too much of life?
I swear a good massage is the easiest way in my pants.
Not that there's a hard way... but you know what I mean.
Did we literally take a cab across the street
The timing couldn't have been better if I planned it. His mom walked away, I vomited in their mulch, and then his mom came back and offered me bread.
He legit pounded my cooking wine, because he was to cheap to buy beer. He is so not getting any.
It hits you later. Like when you wake up on the floor under a puzzle later.
Sadly he is straight as an arrow that is designed by a robot computer from the future with lasers.
This saddens me. Mostly because I want to see the schematics on that robot.
I LOVE YOU NO MATTER HOW MANY BALLS YOUVE SUCKED
Just follow the currents of life. And if they take me on to a guys dick, so be it.
Dude, you need better judgement.Trust me I know. I put my dick in the wrong mouths all the time
So, I had a dream last night that involved you as an actual cloaked Captain America and a lot of weird sex, and I didn't hate it.
I threw your vagina at him like a grenade. And sweet Jesus he caught it like a champ
so i just met a former male stripper who has a lion king tattoo. new BFF? i think yes
Spencer just told me I got home and was opening beers with my teeth and trying to make pot butter
Randomize
