He could be your dad!
We discussed that right before he asked for my number
I knew you were gonna be a good wingman when the words "dibs on the chunky one" came out of your mouth.
We owe the rent and you're unemployed...you're in no financial position to flirt with cocaine addiction.
Let's pretend this is a good idea before I change my mind.
haha you were so trashed that you deleted all of your christian music from itunes and kept saying"c-ya God, nice knowin ya"
He came and then made the Jim Halpert face. does that say disappointment or what
she just uttered the sweetest sentence in the english language...my stripper friends are coming over
i think i'd rather have a trophy of a like jizz stained curtain or something
you think that next time i come over to do this you can pick up the condom wrappers you used on the other girls
Katelyn drunkenly ripped the soap dispenser off the wall so we decided to call it quits
Yeah. You can ask him out. We're just fuck buddies. My vagina will be sad but your heart can be happy.
I send him pictures of my tits whenever I feel like he's paying too much attention to his girlfriend.
There should be a promo code on the Papa Johns website for "I have no moneys but if you send a cute delivery guy I will pay him in blow jobs."
2015 is a year for health and mental stability and alas we are not yet there so yolo
At some point i am going to say to you "i have this really bad idea! You in? " just go with it.
Randomize
