Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
you turned your livingroom into a bong?
Shaq going to Cleveland; Vince Carter to the Magic; Michael Jackson, Farrah Fawcett, and Ed McMahon die.... ARMAGEDDON IS UPON US!!!!!
Ended up passed out drunk in the neighbors lawn, still in costume. Neighbors thought I was a lawn decoration. Ten points for best Halloween ever.
Come scavenge bits of tuna out of my chest hair
i'm sorry for cheering you on when you were making out with him. i was just celebrating the fact he was decent looking for once
We should celebrate the resignation of Berlusconi tonight with too many bottles of wine and sambuca. We're allies, right?
Ok, was I really fucked up or was there a chick from Norway in the ice cream shop teaching us Norwegian last night?
Do you ever feel like your dog agrees with you? Like REALLY really agrees.
2 men making out for 2 seconds to trick a cop so they don't get arrested for being pulled over rolling a blunt is not gay.
You got me so high that I almost couldn't leave my house for a bar because there was nothing to lean against on the way there
They need 20 oz Capri suns with liquor. Douches need to grow up with their clients
I wanna just rip ass and see his reaction but i bet itd be better to shatter that illusion when hes drunk
I think I will always strangely appreciate as well as kick ass at stoned dishes. Like for the rest of my life. Thank you slave job at Starbucks.
CyberMonday=Bulk Condom Shopping For 2018
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