I was hooking up with him in my car, he wouldn't stop with my nipples, I had to literally beat him off of me. He kept groaning too while he was doing it. Sick.
Mommy issues
Come downstairs. Moms serving wine for breakfast again.
Haha its ok. When we got back you sat in the car and attempted to tell me in sign language you were blacked out lol
I'm glad the dog doesn't judge me for doing leftover lines and watching George of the Jungle at 10 am
In a car. Threw up in my mouth. Haven't said a word in 10 minutes.
Well, they emptied out the keg by the third kegstand for America.
The only requirement is that his name is Kevin... All other factors don't matter to drunk me. Drunk me likey Kevins.
Not even desperate vagina wants small cock.
Glad to hear you raised your standards
He said you stopped mid-fuck, called fives on his dick, walked out to grab another drink, and came back.
How do I tell her I need the lights out when I'm getting head because she and my mom share a perm color
i spilled a box of white cheddar cheezits on the bathroom floor about 2 days ago. when i went back to the house he yelled at me from the bathroom: "THANKS FOR THE CHEEZITS, I'll ALWAYS HAVE A SNACK FOR WHEN IM SHITTING NOW!"
Got to use the phrase "sweet pukas dude." My day is made.
YALL MOTHERFUCKERS WANNA WATCH HEAVY METAL AND SMOKE WEED AND PLAY POOL AND DRINK BEER AND SMOKE WEED
I would go disguised as someone he didn't have premature ejaculative sex with but I don't know if I could stay in character.
Mom got drunk as hell, crashed Dad's wedding and some how left with the best man. This is why you should be glad you aren't my sibling.
Randomize
