Dude if it is possible to orgasm from shitting i think it just happened.
how do we leave politely?
Tell them I'm going into labor. I will spill a beer and tell them m water broke.
if he wont fuck me on the stairamster then i dont think theres much XXX shit going down
whoever threw up in my shampooo bottle is totally getting defriended on facebook.
i tried to stop you. you just kept saying your split ends needed punishment.
Hey, did you take me to hospital last night?
Its not even 10am and we are talking about what guys assholes we would finger.
They sext over her pic comments. Role playing as wolves.
i love you man. i hope we fuck some serious shit up this summer.
I'm using the bullet from my cock ring to massage out my tmj lock jaw from giving too much head.
That's how I like my men: traumatized and crying in a ball
Know what was probably a bad idea? Using white wine as a mixer for vodka.
Yeah we do. It needs to be like a good penis- long, substancial, and able to make people cry.
I just have to point out that once I typed "fa" my phone filled in "fatass"
I answered the booty call in my Trophy Wife cutoff and my ex-boyfriends sweatpants with a bottle of jager.
and how was that received?
He was like "why do you look so cute today?" and I said "I showered" and he laughed. I wasn't making a joke
Randomize
