normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
Hey guess what I got for Valentine's day? Debt and blue balls.
My dad told me my only assignment from now til graduation is to not die. it's a legit concern for him.
My last google search of the night was "Things that cost $102.50"
Although I commend your efforts to keep my penis away from her, your sister is now booty walking up my stairs. Good game though, good game.
shes taking the breakup well, i walked in on her naked passed out wearing a turban with a bag of peanut butter choc chips in hand at 5 in the afternoon.
But once you explained how to fill cupcakes with semen I realize you were harmless and right on my level.
THEY AREN'T MARRIED. PUT ON YOUR HOMEWRECKING PANTIES AND GET TO WORK. NO EXCUSES.
He's pretty cool once you ignore the fact that he's trying to get into your pants
Holy Hangover.. I'm marrying whoever put this water by my bed
Your cock has been in the back of my throat. Co-worker is no longer a sufficient title. Fix that shit ASAP
I just walked out of the side door of the bar to come in the front door so no one would know I've been here drinking before our work meeting.
Someone left a middle school yearbook here. I recognized one kid from banging his mom last year.
I just paid my school fees like a real adult who doesn't get accidentally drunk on a Tuesday night
My mom just said "okay girls, the ONLY thing i ask is that you stay sober Saturday afternoon, until halfway through lunch. And you don't wear that crystal camo hat. This is a funeral, not a tailgate party"
Best wishes.
Randomize
