I need a slap back to reality. Or at least a slap back to homosexuality
He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
You drew a lightning bolt on your eye and stomach in eye liner and made me sing Poker face with you in harmonies. I never knew you were still a music major when you were drunk.
I had 4 margarita's and 2 mixed drinks and i blew zero's. Its a cinco de mayo miracle.
Almost peed between 2 cars...till I realized that it's daytime and I'm sober.
By the way, turns out "Danny B" is his penis. Not his cousin. I was right.
you were wandering around the street for like an hour singing "nothing but socks on"..an original you wrote after the 12th shot i believe
She dresses cool and she's mean. And she has fake boobs I feel like I can relate to her on so many levels.
i swear, you were born with a blunt in one hand and somebody else's wallet in the other.
You threw up in a empty pizza box at Pizza Hut and opened the door with your face. So that maybe why it's bruised.
Let's play another riveting game of "Whose boxers are hanging on my fence?"
Was he a virgin!? DID YOU TAKE A GUY'S VIRGINITY ON MY FLOOR!?
Fell asleep on kitchen floor again, chicken nuggets everywhere.
This girl was in the river screaming that someone didn't love her anymore...that's when the guy in a kilt claimed her...
hey i'm sure you are probably asleep bc you suck and think sleep is necessary to live or something?
Randomize
