I just accidentally stumbled into an AA meeting...I think its a sign
I didnt realize til after I got out of her apartment and into the lobby that we lived in the same building.
The worst part of it is that he's not the first man I've fucked with 2+ chihuahua's.
You were directing traffic around her for 30min after she passed out in the middle of the road.
You really are best friends.
There was just way too much discussion about my penis at that party
he was cradling you in his arms feeding you rum straight from the bottle and you kept sucking his fingers.
I'll have you know that I'm still picking duct tape residue off my wrist from sunday
Oh you have a half-brother? Why that's right up my alley! Let's cause family strife
Tearing families apart since 2011.
Ok. So let me get this straight. She treats her vagina like a clown car, yet judges me for just making out with the guy that bought all of us shots?
He let him chew on his fu man chew. The man has the patience of a saint
I woke up with the Dorothy costume at my ankles, both sparkly red shoes on, and clutching ToTo....we're not in Kansas anymore, dude
I went in the closet and cried, then the bathroom and cried, and lastly he showed me his penis and I cried. It was a weird night.
i woke up in just my socks. my clothes were outside, he had rugburn on his elbows, and a window was broken.
Figured out how to triple bathroom speed at #lollapalooza.. Girl squats, guy 1 goes between her, guy 2 uses urinal. Your welcome.
Hey babe! Random question. Do you by chance have the pic of my nipples covered with ninja turtles band aids? Thanks.
Randomize