just fell over trying to sit on the toliet like a robot.
dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
I'll start drinking again when I know where I am
all i remeber is falling off a fence and banging him in the middle of the street, not sure which one gave me this cut
Meanwhile I am sitting on the couch with a 32 ounce rum and coke trying to decide if I'm too drunk to go get french fries.
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
there's a liquor store near my therapist
i might give it a shot.
I'm at some strange place in what feels like Mexico, high and getting tacos.
Imagine getting a FB inbox "hey I found your ID on the floor of a bar can you send me a mugshot so I can get a second piece of ID made?"
Its like a match made in avoid-eachother-because-we're-antisocial-and-awkward heaven
My roommate is downstairs drunk, smoking, and listening to a self help DVD. Please dear God don't let this be the Ghost of Christmas Future.
He was super adorable, like I wanna pinch his cheeks while I fuck him...
It's obvious you're hotter. You've been doing a married guy for almost 2 years.
low point of the night : a cop just busted out laughing at me.
I know she’s pissed I fucked her husband, but I didn’t know he was married until after I blew him at Legoland
Randomize
