what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
Actually considered writing down one of the numbers on the bathroom stall. That's how much I miss vagina.
We are NOT roofying him just to get him to pass out so we can build a masive snow cock in his yard.
The goblet must only be used for good. And vodka. And anything t-pain would be proud of.
my wrists were so small for the handcuffs, i could slip them off and hand the tow truck driver my keys....
I just want to go to their admissions office and show them the video of him taking the flaming shot, and be like yeah...you let in the kid who lit his entire face on fire over me.
Kurt said to text you and encourage you to come out tonight. Encourage you with my rack.
How do I explain the handcuffs and tanning goggles on our living room floor? There's rope too. The cats love the rope.
you 2 were alone in the living room and the dog walked in and you started yelling what are all these people doing in here
He was still there when I ran half naked into my suitemate's room where she was skyping her boyfriend and I started singing I JUST HAD SEEEEX
The paramedics said she just kept whispering "I just wanted to party"
Buffalo PD walked in my bedroom this morning at 7 am. Was still blackout drunk, fully dressed, Steak Out wrapper on the floor, parking meter on the floor of the bar room. 'Both of your doors were wide open, wanted to make sure no one was robbing you.' Then I made a pass at her.
Three Decembers later, I'm looking at this fuckin Santa lingerie I bought and just realized my stocking never got stuffed....
My liver is preforming stress tests.
When he mumbled "I can't feel my legs," proceeded to stand, fall over, and just lay there I knew I'd given great head...
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