Dual, econ, hell, shiv, aunt, puppy. 1 out of 6. T9 word needs to learn how to cuss like me.
Hey its my first time.
I think you mean "it's my first time"
i've never been more proud of someone than i was when he told me he got his first blowjob at age 13...from two chicks
there's a wrestler here in a Ferrari//puma hoodie who is telling girls his win//loss record as a pickup line.
We videoed ourselves having sex... I now know why I close my eyes during sex
I had my own version of the Hangover last night. I woke up to a disassembled Christmas tree, shit on the futon, and a hamster in the bathroom with a necklace on that said "Feed Me Bitch." I don't own a hamster. I don't know what I drank last night, but I want to do it again.
I feel like everything in this room is sweating
You just kept walking around in a circle saying "well played 6th street well played" before falling over.
The bald guy bought me a shot so I chugged it and then walked out to the middle of the dance floor and told an old woman that might be your moms twin to bend it over...We didn't end on a good note though. Dude she stepped on my vans.
There is a drunken, assless white chick here at this bar wearing a shirt that says "REAL WOMEN TWERK FOR JESUS". I have officially had it with our generation.
How do I have sand in my vagina if we were an hour away from the beach?
How did it feel to just observe all the people blacking out usually you're on the other end of things
I felt like I was at the zoo
Mashed potatoes are always the fuckin answer ok.
I smell like bonfire and ex-boyfriends
Recliner chair sex has moments of worry....just don't.
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