actually, I'm a sock model
just do him I won't tell jon
um i'm guessing you meant to send this to tina, thanks for the support in our relationship you whore
Encyclopedia Brown and the case of the missing condom.
I hope Brown isn't a clue to its whereabouts.
quadriplegic porn is always funny
no. no its not
I feel like i'm in the derek zoolander school for kids who can't read good.
Just found two Xanax on the floor at the tanning bed. And yes, Im taking them...looks like going to get cancer is paying off
I have Retrograde Ejaculation as a side effect from one of my meds. Is this a respectable form of birth control?
You crawled everywhere and rolled in ice cream. No more vodka for a month.
I'm. Arresyed bur sierra ue obbe of mt vet friends. I hope we can tyajk ane gwt ob the same page. Ur aweaome ttyl.
My unemployment came through so I'd like to thank the taxpayers of Utah in advance for my level of intoxication this weekend
He's an acquired taste, like S&M or those crunchy things they put in salads
Croutons?
You ever fart so hard while you are asleep that you wake up screaming?
I had sex in a panda mask the other night.
Maybe snorting K off penises isn't healthy
Hey buddy, turns out those were the PB&shroomwiches, soooo you may want to reconsider dinner with your girlfriends family tonight...
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