I just want to know how you cleaned her puke off the twister mat with no gloves. And didn't throw up
I dont ever wanna see you tell my little brother to "spread the seed" ever again
there is no way he can be that small
look on the bright side he'll over comepensate
Well, let me tell you, it was the most vivid sex dream I've ever had. More so than the Paris Hilton one I had in 05. And about as weird.
Everybody in the immediate area is hooking up like it's doomsday
WHY AM I NOT THERE?
I sat down next to him and my bra just unhooked itself
Today wasn't Sunday Funday, it was more like Sunday god is taking a shit on my life day
Forced to cancel my booty call due to the snowpocalypse. This crosses the line.
On the upside, no one went to the hospital! Lex's friend was definitely on fire at one point last night though because he tried to juggle tiki torches. He was shirtless this morning and smelled like a BBQ.
UPDATE: IM NOT A TEEN MOM LETS GO PARTY
This place is full of unfortunate mustaches.
I'm so bored I talked to the Bible guys for 30 minutes.
I offered them beer last time they came here bahaha
I know it's going to be a good day because he didn't notice the bite mark on my butt.
How did you interpret 'wheat thins' from 'vaginal trauma'?
Dude my toilet did not deserve what I just did to it
Randomize
