I think condoms have that nasty latex smell to remind you in the morning of how gross you are.
if I'm ever single again, I swear to god I'm going to have 87 venerial diseases
after drinking 6 jumbo margaritas he then proceeded to tell the entire restaurant that he was going to "bust a load in me" when we got home....how do you think the rest of my night went?
I just masterbated while imagining him getting hit by a truck. I have hit a completely unacceptable level of anger & bitterness. Help.
Girls night always turns into let's seperate and get laid night.
i can recognize that vagina from a mile away
He sent me a Microsoft outlook meeting request to blow him in the storage room at work. I had to accept.
I feel like as your wife, as cool with your decision-making skills as I usually am, there should be a bigger explanation to you adopting a child while I'm in Houston.
Well after the shots I danced with a homeless guy, split my toe on broken glass, and had a 20 piece mcnugget. Who says postgrad life is boring.
As a plus, I've lost 5 pounds in two days, so "party all weekend" is officially a valid diet plan.
I was originally going to go as fembot from Austin Powers
I wanted to have tiny guns for tits
Nothing says "single girl" quite like Pinot Grigio and canned ravioli at 11:30 pm....
He just flipped the beer pong table and set the ceiling fan on fire things are about to get crazy
I almost just opened my door to get my pizza butt ass naked
After returning from the hospital with lock-jaw from getting tackle at the game. Some naked chick busted out of his room and hit him with a devastating haymaker to the jaw because he wouldn't have sex
Randomize
