spell your last name, im trying to find you on facebook
Why did I wake up this morning with 10 tally marks on my hand and a penis drawn on my tits?
I discovered the grieving process is shock, denial, anger...and then something about drinking until you puke on yourself
i got totally wasted at 2pm and cleaned the house bc i was bored. my mom now supports my alcohol problem
girls just need to accept the fact that i'm going to make out with their boyfriends
she's sitting here naked with heels and a taco.
You is good. You is important. You is a slut.
How do you respond to a booty call from yesterday?
He recreated the night that started all my mothers days. We shared a joint, drank Boones Farm, and dry humped to the Beastie Boys. Then I cried over MCA's death. Best. Gift. Ever.
And if you ever tell anyone that I have emotions ill kill you
I just stole a bunch of balloons from a birthday party and am giving one to each person at the bar.
The dick lei will go down in squad history
i'm sitting in bed scratching my boobs and wearing a sparkly fedora and have no one to blame but myself
Let this be a lesson to you, parmesan cheese crumbles are not a good substitute for coffee creamer, no matter how high you are
We need to find out what drug we took so we can take it everyday from here on out
Randomize
