that's fine. btw we still need $500 for the donkey...
I don't understand how he can't hear himself snoring, but he'll wake up to me sneaking m&m's from my junk food stash beside the bed...
I have shoes on. No pants. And my jacket pockets are full of ketchup and grass. Yes. Good night.
while we were having sex she stopped and said, "god is always watching". Then she started again with no other words said. We were fucked up.
He gave them shots of purell and called it "acid rain" jello shots. They took them.
I hate freshman.
I was in the shower, he came in, had me give him a blow job, and left. I'm pretty sure I was just booty called. While taking a shower.
Please tell me why there is some girl tied to our toilet?
And we won't even have to pay the tab if we die AT the bar. So..win win.
Thank you for FINALLY joining the Slutasorus Rex club in this conversation.
This medicine is making me nuts. I just woke up and I thought I was in a glass case with Asians staring at me.
Beat the bartender in a shot challenge for a free tab. I won that, and him. I never get tired of the "this is my first time with a guy.." bullshit.
How do you even...
The magic of Christmas. And whiskey, of course.
I had sex with him for the first time drunk, dressed in a toddler overall tutu costume, at 2pm. Horrible start.
It was like sex on an active volcano surrounded by the night sky and bloodhounds. And by that I mean it was nice.
There's a fuckload of syrup all over the floor.
Did I tell you I drunk fucked my one roommate last week
Uh no
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