lol earlier she was acting like a normal gf... and then BANG! shes touching herself again...
I left when they started reinacting what appeared to be a jerry springer episode
alright she left, finally time to fart up the room
Someone in my history class just FB messaged me saying they highly suggest I put my sunglasses on. He is sitting 18 rows in front of me...
We just passed a billboard that said to join "jerseydoesntstink.com" and literally 15 seconds later, we could smell jersey.
well as my mentor always said, "Don't antagonize the man whose penis gives you multiple orgasms."
She just referred to her vagina as "this bitch".
I think our camping neighbours like us. We're the drunk girls trying to chop firewood with no pants on at 3 in the afternoon.
That was obviously his first time talking dirty. He called my vagina "pretty"
But once you explained how to fill cupcakes with semen I realize you were harmless and right on my level.
What is it with the dog running away when we have epic hangovers
He told me to prepare for his "Jurassic cock" and I had to leave the room from laughing.
so we just got back from swapping peoples patio furniture around to different patios. some people might like unexpected change. others might regret living on the ground floor.
Anal on new furniture sounds like a quickest way to violate a warranty
If he wants a future he'd best figure out the calendar function on his phone. If he can invite you to his penis he can invite you to his google cal.
Randomize
