how about we just leave your boyfriend out of this
ok i said sorry. what else do you want?
100 blowjobs
Flowers- 20. Dinner-50. Drinks- 25. Hotel- 150. The look on his face when I tell him I'm on my period? Priceless.
I doubt the Taliban would support fake nipples.
its totally unfair that im just as ill-prepared as a 16 year old but there's no tv show for 25 and pregnant.
4pm on a Sunday....roomate fucking like a wildabeast while I have a organic chemistry study group in my kitchen.
the scent of your tears make me crave pizza
My reasons for going are selfish. She just opened her own law firm. I figure having a lawyer as a friend is a good idea. Nothing in my life suggests I won't need a lawyer again.
She thinks Jesus was an astronaut.
Maybe is for pussies. We only say yes in this household
so I was eating out this girl who was wearing my pirate hat In an alley behind the bar last night and some girl walks up and takes a picture. apparently we had a crowd of about 10 and it turned her on so she just didn't tell me
he appreciated my fucking vagina for two hours he can appreciate my honesty
Decided to stay in tonight. Completely sober. Just got two drunken booty calls within 5 minutes of each other. This is my life.
Can’t. It’s taco and dick night.
Wrong Cuomo but I had a dream last night in which I was very sexually attracted to Chris
Randomize
