You're never going to guess who I just worked out next to..
Who?
Chris brown
No way... I bet he was intense
Are you kidding? He was prob training for round two
spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
Tonight, I'm planning on being a bigger trainwreck than Britney Spears circa 2007.
Fat chicks shouldn't bartend
people should stop making movies, we'll never top bio-dome.
she would only give me a road handjob because she didnt want to unbuckle
safety first
Responsibility does not care about your dick.
I mean we've tried to get high on nutmeg, we clearly dont know the definition of "too far"
just printed out my drug dealers resume for him. guess the ecstasy scene slows down when kids move back home for the summer...
There was a community pot of Ramen, and if you were in the pool you were either fully clothes or ass naked.
Just got assigned a beer bong as hw in fluids to demonstrate the inverse of pascals principle. I love this prof
She took a six hour road trip with me so I could have revenge sex with my ex's brother. That is the definition of a best friend.
Was about to close the deal last night until he said he hadn't seen the Taylor Swift video. So I made him watch it before I let him have sex with me.
Waiting on the notification from my fitness pal that tells me I'm an alcoholic
I had sex with two guys in one day. One on my grandma's couch, one on a golf course. This is the greatest post-surgery accomplishment I could ask for.
Randomize
