I walked up to her and said hello and wanted to ask her if she had fun last night... she asked me if we had met before.
I just woke up to people screaming "funnel" in my kitchen....
Happy St. Patrick's Day.
I was in bed at 845. Affairs take a lot out of people
votre penis est TRES GRAND. i used vous because your penis is SO big
At the ER. Dropped bottle lead to cut foot which led to me drunk hitting on doctors. Not going well.
And in my birthday dress, with my friends, i peed on myself in line for the club. Still went in and partied. I remember pieces
She sent pictures and the names of her 2 cats and her dog and told me that I should be happy to have met the whole family.
You must be good in bed dude
We're not on Beacon Street anymore so now your argument about not peeing on the sidewalk holds no water. Whereas my bladder has holded every water.
So the next three days will be henceforth known as the 'celebration of the end of the most irresponsible years of my life' be prepared to wake up naked in a ditch.
Nursing home in NJ just got busted for prostitution and drugs...dropping off my deposit tomorrow
He had really great hair, but he told me he's been in a psych ward three times. I mean I know I'm a psych major, but that's too much.
You throw up behind 1 mannequin and it's world war 3 in forever 21
Thou shall not get drunk and hit bitch cup in pong and take shirt off while wearing a see-through lace bra again
It all started with a game of naked twister.
Listen I don't care what it's called as long as it's drugs
Randomize
