I need to talk to you about an important matter involving lesbians.
Maybe we should try and tone it down a notch. The neighbors changed the name of their wifi network to "i can hear you having sex".
The required reading for this week is a paper about birds called great tits. Let's see my TA keep a straight face through this discussion.
In case you were wondering...putting everclear into a humidifier DOES get you really really drunk.
But it's not about our feelings, it's about making the men we sleep with feel awful about their lives
His IQ is so high, I swear I started ovulating when he told me the number.
You kept yelling "wood grain wheel" and grinding on fat chicks.
The hell is wrong with me
Maybe I'll make your dreams come true and pee on you tomorrow.
WHY did you say no to the sex seance?
this old dude from the bar is giving me a ride home in a van, his bumper sticker says " don't laugh your kids could be in here" scary world ou here
debating what would be more effort, turning on to my other side or trying to get myself off with my left hand. that kind of lazy day.
That's why my New Years resolution was no more blondes. They're all bad news
I just gotta say that I feel so much better now that I got some. I mean I feel like a normal functioning adult ready to contribute to society.
Also, you fell asleep with you hand on and around my cock last night.
I'm just hoping that with all the times he's puked in my yard a mushroom field might grow.
Randomize
