Drinking mikes hard & watching the swan princess. i fucking LOVE college
Ya know, years from now when that kid is old enough, I'll get to regale him with the story of how I was his father's AND uncle's first gay experience.
So, after having sex with my 4th overweight girl in 2 weeks, I've decided Charlie Sheen syndrome is ruining my life.
I just woke up to pictures of every angle of his dick I'll ever need to see.
Can I sell my birth control in a yard sale?
Second night back. Go to house party and played ring of fire. Me plus five other people completely naked. College wins.. It's going to be a long semester
This is the weirdest negotiation ever.
This is what happens when two people with zero shame try to argue.
Honest to god.. She looks better fat. I never would have imagined those words coming out of my mouth, EVER.
you should be awarded for your promiscuity.
i really should.
I don't think ill be here long the chick I came to see is blowing rails with a drag queen
I look like shit btw. Like the joker from Batman.
I'm not sure how that's possible unless you put on face paint. Which I would respect.
Dude she tried to bite my face off last night, literally. I have never actually felt like a piece of meat until that point in life...
So I told him "To answer your question yes I am naked making pizza pops in your kitchen"
She can be as judgemental as she wants. But she thinks the female orgasm is a myth so who is really winning here...
Have I told you i love you?
there's no need we are two peas in a naughty pod of fuckery
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