last night i found where hot topic managers go to die after they get fired.
well judging by the amount of dired blood around my nipple rings i'm gonna assume it was a good night
I am VERY upset that you called my fiesta a waste of time.
Whiskey and I have a long and stories tradition of excellence
You didn't even properly utilize my pigtails.
U should feel bad.. u r like a sex politician. All talk and no follow thru
If you come home soon there's a stripper in the shower. Don't be alarmed
remember how i yelled at you for inviting that coke dealer to the party?! i found the $100 bill they were snorting with in the couch.
..new slutty dresses or booze? i won't even waste time with the i told you so.
He walked into the pizza shop... Pulled the fire alarm.. And proceeded to dance to it...
I just hit on a guy in a doughnut store... is that too suggestive?
Would it be weird to jack off in the hospital?
Funny how I'm trusting a magic 8 ball I found in the kids toy section to tell me about my sex life
Thanks for putting up with my drunk friend last night. Its all fun and games till someone pukes macaroni under your fridge.
valentines day is a day for loved ones to share. So me and my vibrator. Happy holidays.
Nice classy night out before we roll our faces off
Randomize
