You know you think of me naked too
Not since I found Jesus
Nick had a break down & said to me "Everybody's mad at me, I'm the douchebag, Im the fucking douchebag that everyone hates, Do you wanna come home with this douchebag?!"
You're going home with him aren't you?
I'll see ya in the morning when I leave his house
he fingered me, smelled his fingers, then asked me what i ate today..
I'm basically sure i was the reason for glitter on his penis
I put the beer in my little red riding hood basket.
I'll never ask another girl to get on top again, that girl from the bar last night got on top and shit diareah all over my ball sack while she was cumming.
This is the last weekend of getting drunk and having sex all nite with the plumber. I'm exhausted all weekend and I'm never going to finish the remodel at this rate
You have all been randomly chosen to participate in a new game called: how high was I? If you have any information about this or about where my clothing items went give me a shout. Thanks an good luck.
I have no idea. There are 6 asians singing hey soul sister to me right now.
Call me old-fashioned, but I don't think the words, "Finger my ass" should find their way into casual conversation.
She mentions her boyfriend one more time, I'm taking her home and breaking that shit up.
I tried sex in a car once. It was like trying to do yoga in a drainage pipe with your arms and legs tied while using a typewriter with your penis.
Im not sure if the cops that just came are strippers or actually cops
I mean, drunk me really liked him, maybe sober me will too. Who am I to deny fate?
she wouldnt leave because they were playing One Direction. I'm dating a thirteen year old.
Randomize
