i'm watching the tyra show: "women who beat up their boyfriends" - lets see how she can make THIS one all about herself too.
One of my preschool students told me today that it's not pollution that makes the water in lakes unclean. It's the hobos. I was absolutely speechless. And just so proud.
i'm sure the inside of her vag looks like Normandy circa 1944
and yes i had to double check that date for that joke to be accurate
Desperately trying not to throw up over the side of the ferry back to CT. Can't be the first one of the season.
No she stopped screaming. Now she's eating popcorn. Off a plate. With a spoon.
Sitting in the library studying = googling how to get laid in the library.
Your engaged. Stop telling guys you will sit on their face. They don't always know your kidding.
VAGINAS ASSEMBLE!
I'm not seeing this movie with you.
Why the hell did you invite him? He's gonna bring two more inches of dick and zero fun.
Oh boy. Send him a care package with laxative cookies and alcohol. So he can shit himself while he's passed out drunk.
One small step for man, one big gay fierce leap for gays!
So Doritos and vodka was obviously not as good an idea as I thought at the time.
All my female reproductive organs were screaming HELL YES last night.
Beer. Pizza. Seething Rage. I will be full of two of these things tonight. You get to decide which two.
I'm pretty sure he sprained my clit...
Randomize
