So thats when I found out ur supposed to put the penut butter on your balls not your dogs balls, feels alot better
sometimes in life you just needs hand puppets
The amount of pregnancy tests I've taken in my life is unhealthy
bad sex. bad bad bad. it was like trying to pick up an overcooked noodle with an empty pringles can. why do these guys always seem to find me?
I may or may not go. send a pic of a nipple so I know how much fun you're having
Well just watched a guy puke in a trash can then proceed to pick pizza outta said trash can and eat it
I sent him this really overly apologetic text asking him out. It was just sad. Not even 27 shots of whiskey can grow me a self-esteem.
Thought about you all night last night, then I fucked the shit out of my boyfriend. Win win for me.
You must be buzzed on Miller Lite.. Zen master advice is flowing
It's something I can't competently describe without making sex sounds.
the worst fight me and my gf ever had was over Guy fieri
go for it girl, the world is ur dick oyster
Woke up with a throbbing vagina and a lesbian in my bed. Then for the hell of it we had morning sex. Definitley bisexual now
What does it mean when the bartender gives you 4 straws?
The REAL engagement ring is the jeweled butt plug.
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