It's like God shit irony all over that family
that sweater is a total boner killer. you might as well be wearing a wedding dress.
I want to give my boyfriend great head for his birthday...can i practice on you?
he asked if he could put his cape on while he was still inside me.
is it just my freshly shaved vagina or is the guy at the end of the table pretty cute??
And then somehow we were arguing over how to fold our arms
Can't a girl send out a 4 pm booty call anymore
The grocery store is a combo of ghetto ppl complaining that the low fat chips are all that's left and hipsters trying to eat organic during the hurricane
proof that my night is going well: I can still open doors
I think you have the right to know, the water bottle you drank out of the other night is the bottle we use to catch what drips from the toilet. Love you!
Bring your friend that fell asleep in the bathroom for my friend.
The less money I spend on drugs, the happier my mom will be.
I m a li title tea p or short and sto u. T.... Here is my haaandley
C ANGT CATCH NE IM THE GIBNGER BREAS MAB
Kinda hard to look your partner in the face the day after a rousing game of How Many Ways Can I Capture Your Penis.
No I'm not lying to you. I'm just not telling you the whole story. There's a massive difference.
Randomize
