i was shrooming and she was sobbing. i was trying to be sympathetic, but i could see the veins working like worms under her skin. and then her face stripped down to the muscle.
what was she crying about?
i wanna say it was the lack of skin on her face but maybe she lost her job.
I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
Yeah, but I'm out of licorice and there's no way anywhere near here will rent us all mopeds on a Tuesday night.
There is a half eaten corn dog and soy sauce on the counter... WTF did you eat last night??
shut up. I wear heels bigger than your dick
I didn't think her British accent was real until I saw how fucked up her teeth were.
I found a tip from a dart in my bra this morning
The two guys from next door helped him do a backflip. The ended up throwing him halfway through a ceiling tile. Don't worry, we fixed it with duct tape.
it doesn't matter, he's just a life support system for his dick
Overslept. So hungover. Apparently texting the first person in my contact list the time I would like to wake up is not how the alarm clock in my phone actually works.
I'm gonna fuck that sweet little pussy of yours into absolute submission
Wow. Sorry. As soon as I sent that I felt inappropriate. But yes. Bring a sandwich after. Lol
You're doing a terrible job of letting me hook up with girls vicariously through you.
We were just sitting together and this guy walks up to us and says, "you ladies are drinking too slow", puts a 5 dollar bill on the table and just leaves the bar. Helloooo Taco Bell
She asked me if I would fuck her with my storm trooper mask on
Naptime over. I've got fresh contacts and tequila. RAAAAAAGE!
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