party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
my periods are so regular now that they are sync-ed with my subscriptions of vogue.
i just found a bag of weed behind my capital one card. i guess that's what's in my wallet.
i seriously just saw a stripper from last weekend walk into the classroom next to me!!
The sun is out and the snow is finally starting to melt here... Vodka bottles keep popping up everywhere. Guess it's the college version of burying nuts for the winter
the russians are downstairs with the vodka loudly proclaiming happy birthday america. i don't care if it's the fourth, i care that it's 9 am and they woke me up.
Dear God. I kissed a man tonight who was born in 1936.
Well I don't know him that well so I don't think I can give advice. You should make him a cake. Or have sex with him.
HOW IS IT EARTHLY POSSIBLE TO DO THAT MUCH DAMAGE WITH JUST MY THUMBS?? HOW???
she gave me her number and i just said "no. cant."
why does CNN give a flying $@*# about the royal baby so, so much?
i hope they name him Joffrey
The woman in the flower onesie is claiming she hasn't been drinking.
Can finally say I won't be lonely this Valentine's day! Mother nature decided to drop by.
We found you walking up the on ramp to the highway carrying a 40 mph speed limit sign with no shoes on. Rough night?
Dude I woke up with a handprint shaped bruise on my ass, a pong ball in my cleavage, and somebody else's gold chain around my neck. Who's house am I in?
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