Our friend ended up naked, bleeding, requesting we throw a couch at him cause he was convinced he could block it
We did he did.
When I say naked, I mean penis exposed. Not in boxers
if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
I've never seen anyone write a check for a bar tab before
I bruise way too easily for the kind of rough sex I want...
how did the keg end up in the top bunk?
I got used. This is the happiest day of my life. I was just a huge cock and that is all she needed.
She just gave me a free latte.
Correction. She just have you a frothy, creamy path to that vagina.
take 2 Ambien then drink a Red Bull and watch Alice in Wonderland. Trust me.
you puked in the bathtub and said "let them pee"
I got drunk and slept with the guy who looks like Jesus.
Typical.
I'm hungover during 4th grade graduation practice. I AM THEIR FUTURE.
I just took a service station dump so foul I had to buy gas out of guilt
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
I wish I had a tail.
Why?
...why not?
So. My mom went grocery shopping for me while I was at work & brought the food here. Cool bc my dildo was laying on the counter. Forgot I left it out. I am sure she saw. Im mortified.
Randomize
