After watching Cinemax for a few months, real porn just grosses me out.
The bartender let me pay my bar tab with my itunes giftcards.
I'm pretty sure you thought I could absorb alcohol through my dress
I can't wait till you move in so I can stop drinking alone.
it's a Wednesday?
:)
Traveling before 21 and traveling after 21 are two different things. There's a whole nother world of red white and blue weird out there
Wtf man. I knew she was bad news. No sane person cares if you eat their raviolli.
I just want to have sex and eat oreos. and then take body shots. like everyday.
Remember Christopher who always sends me pictures of his penis? Look to your right, boy in the blue.
I left my panties in the microwave for too long and they caught on fire
Cheese, the small of a woman's back, the universe, mountains, vampiric demons, sleep, and dreams.
They don't have a Valentines Day card for the married guy I'm sleeping with. It can't use the words, love, soulmate, you're the only one for me...and obviously it can't be anything related to spending the day together because that's not happening.
I'm sitting in my car avoiding a customer. Apparently the new year hasn't affected my attitude nor work ethic
I just remembered that I insisted everyone watch porn together last night.
it’s about to be september and all i keep thinking is what if i go (another) full calendar year without having sex?
Abby there's no shame in reading porn. It takes more work than watching I suppose
Randomize
