Have you come up with a team name for the beer pong tournament on Saturday?
We can be the stepdads. If anyone asks why say because we beat you and you hate us.
Now i know why people get high. I sat in the same chair for about 3 hours and the only thing i worried about was how far away my chinese food was.
if you were to get worldwide popularity from playing guitar with a plastic yellow bat while drunk on YouTube, would you hate me?
Oh well. haha. i couldn't really understand what she was saying. i just nodded a lot. i guesss she found that sexy.
gotta love spring break
gotta love slutty girls from the south
There aren't nearly as many guys masturbating on chatroulette as i was led to believe...i feel cheated
I had 4 margarita's and 2 mixed drinks and i blew zero's. Its a cinco de mayo miracle.
he aplogized for the shitty sex and called me "ma'am" when he did it. And he wants redemption sex. Gah I love southern gentlemen.
all I remember is repeatedly winking at the fire marshall while he was counting the people in the bar
I just put on eyeliner and a diff shirt in case the pizza guy is cute. This is what my dating life has come to
Maybe he'll be famous someday and I can forget that anything embarrassing may have happened and just say that I fucked that famous guy.
i don't think i have enough personality to make it through this date sober.
By NOT going to the gym, I'm helping my future. I don't want stripping, prostitution, or porn to be viable money making options.
Found out my grandpa had two wives and found out I'm eligible for some internships 11/10 would do acid again.
I opened my eyes to the dog snorting coke, I decided it was best to just close my eyes and forget what I saw
He told me that losing me was the biggest mistake of his life. Of course it was. My tits are incredible and I know more about college football than he does.
Randomize
