My bad bro. I had no idea that when i suggested our triva team name be my last abortion tickled, that she would bring up cancun. Stay strong i think she really liked you
No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
I need to shower. I still have paint on me from the homeless guys
I just smoked my last bit of kief with a grill lighter. This is what crackheads must feel like.
I was going to make out with him...then he licked syrup off the kitchen floor.
Serious question: when you had my right nipple in your mouth, did my nipple ring have both of the balls on it, or was it missing one. Current situation: missing one.
I would like to apologize once again for rubbing your thigh with my hands and face for a very long time last night.
Why do you have an empty bottle of port in your bathroom bin?
i just googled coccaine effects on sexual performance..maybe im dating the wrong guy
I swear to fucking god if he takes away netflix I will have no problem sending his gf our sex videos
Ugh it's 2016, why can't our bodies just shed fat on their own
I tried to order dominos and couldn't but I accidentally placed an order for this morning. I knew I did it last night and was gonna call and cancel this morning but honestly it's coming in 30 minutes and I need it
Woke up way too warm in the middle of a spooning sandwich. Was working up a rant about still not wanting a threesome. Then I realized the littlest spoon was the dog. Might need to break up anyway.
I need a rain check on breakfast. A frat boy said it was his dream to sleep with a MILF, I made his dream come true and he made me cum
There is no way I’m wasting 21 year old morning wood
Dude I had my dad cock block me once
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