google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
i'm pissing behind 7/11. if you guys leave... i'll think it's funny too
Anddd after the worst sex of my life, he said.."do you mind taking off the condom, tying it up, and throwing it at the door?" Weird.
Does the phrase 'traumatizing near-threesome' mean anything to you.
I could be wrong, but im pretty sure i jumped off the roof after my lighter.
Some guy is walking around the bar with his dick out. Health code violation?
I'm laying in the fetal position on the floor of my kitchen eating potato salad with my fingers. Please come over with some real food and keep me company.
You did it first. I was merely expressing my support for you, by pressing my testicles against a window.
I blacked out at work again... Except this time my boss watched me throw up by the bus stop and some woman let me sleep on her shoulder for an hour. Why does this keep happening?
You ever fart so hard while you are asleep that you wake up screaming?
Senior week was like trying to herd cats. Very drunk cats.
I lost my bra, he lost his virginity. Seems like a fair trade off.
YOU DONT EAT A GIRL OUT AND THEN GO PUKE ASSHOLE
i got kicked out of the casino for drunken disorderly conduct because i kept stumbling into old people and one of them told on me. as the boucer was taking down my information so i could no re-enter i ripped my id out of his hands while yelling fuck you.
I just watched two birds fight or fuck. It was crazy. Another bird was watching closer and I know that bird understood what was happening better than me.
Randomize
