Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
Spaghetti and Car Bombs, good idea or what will end up on the bar in a few minutes?
i suspect the closest i'll get to a valentine this year is a 16 year old on chat roulette asking me to show my tits. step up from last year, i guess.
Just found a picture of a hobo making out with her tits...a HOBO
He did the "not my house dance." Apparently it involves spreading cereal on the floor and then grinding into the carpet in bare feet while singing "not my house" over and over and dancing.
he asked my vagina if she was excited to meet Leonard. LEONARD. His fuckin penis is named Leonard.
Yeah that's one way to look at it on the other hand MY FUCKING BED CAUGHT ON FUCKING FIRE
I'm kinda surprised he wouldn't be honored to take me back as a fuck buddy.
He says it takes a lot to subdue the urge to just bury his face in my vagina. Of course, I have absolutely no problem with this.
2015 is the year I FINALLY ALMOST had enough dick to satisfy me.
I just blacked back in and I'm at a kids birthday party in a suit and people are calling me uncle Carl. Never having your homemade liquor again.
yeah it's a weird friendship. we pretend that we're automatic besties but i know we both know i slept with her boyfriend
I kept screaming at his rabbit: "IT'S OKAY, YOU CAN HAVE SOME TRIX. FUCK THOSE SELFISH BITCHES."
Anyway, that's been my evening- crying and looking up diabetes symptoms. How was your night?
The dog peed on the neighbors baby Jesus. No wonder she thinks we're the devil.
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