I spent a large portion of the night trying unsuccessfully to keep hayley (who was wearing a dress and no underwear) from doing handstands, but yea it was fun. the boys had fun
where are you?
sonic
Good. I hungoveredly cleaned your room. This is what being married is going to be like. I pick the condoms up off the floor and you bring home the hot dogs.
This girl just stopped in the middle of a sentence because of my blue eyes. She said she got lost in them. I am laying pipe tonight.
had to bail. she had her cat tattooed on her
So hungover. Sitting in class about to puke during this ladys flute performance. Not sure why were having a flute concert in biology
There is ecstasy everywhere. Get over here right no5w. The 5 is silent.
It's like a puppy that we have to take care of at all times or else she'll get sad, lonely, and chew on the furniture. And by 'chew on the furniture', I mean have anonymous sex.
The moment you ate chicken nuggets out of your purse you were my hero.
Where the hell did i get chicken nuggets from
There has to be a way to make college graduation in Las Vegas different than any other Tuesday in Las Vegas. Strippers? Been there. Getting arrested for public indecency on the strip? Done that.
Ur dog was like a damn middle school chaperone this morning trying to lay between us after what he saw us do last night
He hasn't responded, but he probably just jizzed in his shorts again, so I'll give him time.
If she has AMC, I may have to fuck her today. I want to catch up on the walking dead.
I just spent my entire state tax return on sex toys
I guess I can give it a shot. I usually just get belligerently drunk and go where my penis and feet lead me. No fights or getting too lost, so they seem to be doing a good job
We're exchanging our favorite porn sites at 9 am. I think this brings our relationship to a whole new level
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