I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
Going to bed naked. Too bad I am all alone. Need to make some changes. Either sleep with clothes or with you
Amandyke just told me shes gonna make my tongue her cum rag. i'm borderline terrified
the cure to his relationship is in or around my vagina.
Police were just in my backyard to recover a loaded .38. What the fuck?????
the guy i hooked up with is asleep on our couch. please dont fuck him.
Soo I have a handle of 100 proof captain, cupcakes, and nothing to get up for in the morning.. This blizzard is shaping up to be a great night.
Also we decided you're the person whose going to die at my bachelor party...do the math you're the most logical choice
It's official. 2011 is the year of sport fucking
How much is that going to cost?
A lot of beer.
todays sighting is titled: Bum taking pictures with an invisible camera.
My makeup looks extraordinary for nine tequila shots, running four blocks, falling asleep with my face in the toilet, and doing the walk of shame across campus in the rain. And to think I'm single.
Laying on a pile of just out of the dryer clothes because this is NOT real life.
He asked if I had any questions. Apparently, "how thick is the stick up your ass" was not a correct question.
so he found out i have him as "average size" in my phone. fair to say we arnt going to be dating anymore
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