i found your underwear in my bra... i dont even remember how this happened.
shit. all i remember is the look on your moms face.
Kelly Kapowski is pregnant and it's not Zach Morris'. I no longer believe in true love.
There's a girl n class drinking wine out of a taco bell cup. I can smell it.. it's totally reisling. JEALOUS.
he said he "kind of had sex before.. Barely" i think it was one of those situations where you slide into home and get tagged out.
just upper decked a verizon store cause they don't cover against "getting phone crushed by a keg." had to pay 175 for a new one
yeah he was eating me out and i didnt know someone made popcorn so I thought the smell was comming from my vagina
wtf
He went around feeding all the high kids pretzels. He's like their god now
for the record, graham crackers won't get the taste of cock out of your mouth. also we're out of graham crackers
Please take a moment of silence for the fact that I still have all 10 fingers
Also I just took a shit at a bar so always remember that ANYTHING is possible.
Celebrating anything "Eve" is never a good choice! I feel like my soul's been put in a blender on the "destroy" setting- in other news: Happy 4th of July
I wish we knew morse code and could knock to each other through the wall
I also turned off the Anchorman DVD start menu before cause I didn't want Will Ferrel watching me lose my virginity.
I specifically remember rubbing my eyes thinking I could definitely go blind and I really like came to terms with it I was like ok my other senses will develop this is fine
He managed to rip my nipple last night....
Randomize
