That's intense
I found the seven page love letter I had written you. I'm sorry i was so obsessed.
she tasted like a mixture of sweat and destiny
weed, chlorine, and victory. my bed smells like i had sex with michael phelps.
I sat a few seats down and one row behind a cute girl at the Cubs game today. Having watched her talk to the guy next to her, I found out only her name and age. I then used that information and pieced it together with over 500 girls on Facebook with the same name. I found the same girl, and we're now fbook friends.
if being a creepy fuck was an olympic sport, they'd think you were using performance enhancing drugs...
Do you realize that we tried to rent a limo at 5am to come and take us to waffle house?
the cops didnt even wait to start drinking the confiscated alchohol from the party
my summer class's final was canceled bc it interfered with the world cup. he is giving us all A's on it. I love europe
He walked into my room in the middle of the night, whispered something about the patriot act, and took my tv.
have i crossed some slutty boundary when gay guys are sending me cock pics?
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
There was a cop outside the house so we just put the alcohol in this watermelon
And I'm only telling you that because I really wanted to use 'my boyfriend' and 'dick biscuit' in the same sentence.
Just walked past the field playing Jesus music with a fanny pack full of condoms and beer. Happy Sunday.
I would offer you moral support, but I have questionable morals..
Randomize
