Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
Dude, just got a bummer.
What??
A blow job from a homeless chick.
for future reference: anal bleach BEFORE boozing
Question: does the slut gene come from the mother or the father? im trying to figure out who to blame.
i like him when i'm sober AND when i'm drunk.i've been searching for this my whole life
do you think the bartender judged us for asking for shots of well vodka and water chasers?
Escorted a stripper to her car last night,and all I got was a "Thanks" and "Go Steelers."
Do you know how difficult it is to give head to someone who's imitating Forrest Gump?
If i want her back i know all i have to do is sleep with a specific handful of her closest friends. That method is tried and true.
The number of people who end up getting laid as a result of the cha cha slide....is terrible.
I was thinking that maybe I should not apply to Wells Fargo because they def have me on candid camera taking a drunken nap at 3am in their lobby.
Dry heaving on campus is my new low. Also, go pats
Trump won PA by a fucking landslide. If only Cruz hadn't eaten that booger.
Baked out of my mind. Went in the bathroom, a daddy long leg spider and a carpenter ant are battling it out on the floor. I brought my computer with some dubstep.
OMG THE ANT WON
If I get really high and watch Beauty and The Beast on our Netflx account, will you judge me?
Only if you start before I get home!
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